When we are at rock bottom and there is no light to be seen, it is easier to stay down there than to try and get out. God and a relationship with Him seems so far off, like your chances of winning the lottery. In fact, a relationship with Him is like winning the lottery. It is amazing, and every day you stand in awe of who He is and what He has done for you. But unlike winning the lottery, your chances of having a relationship with God are 100%…if you want a relationship with Him.
I fell into my “rock bottom” a while ago. I won’t lie, I liked it there. I made a home there for a while. I did this when I was about 13-14. I didn’t understand what following God really was. I didn’t know what to do. And every sin that I was living in was comforting. But I soon found out that they would only be comforting for a little while. My depression and anxiety, neither of which I understood, stood in first place. I found myself somewhere where everything temporarily comforted me and when it didn’t, I was left empty. I was left finding something else to comfort me. Nothing worked. But when those temporary moments of feeling whole came, I loved my rock bottom. But in choosing to stay at my rock bottom, I was choosing to follow God tomorrow.
I loved going to my youth group and worshiping God. I loved learning about Him. But it wasn’t enough for me to come out of my rock bottom yet. My heart still wanted to stay down there. But finally, through a lot of tugging, Christian music, Christian camp, church, and youth group, I came back to God. I chose to follow Him that day, not the next day, but that day. Which at the time, was my today.
This is a decision I make daily. When I wake up and choose to follow God, I am choosing to not go back to my life full of sin. It was and is the best decision I made and make. I found what makes me whole every minute of every day. I found what makes me smile when life and Satan are attacking me. I found what keeps me centered. I found my light, even after I hit rock bottom.
When I asked my friends what it’s like to follow God, they all used the same word: amazing. One of them told me how whole and loved they feel. When you follow God, you are gaining so much. God is the One who created everything. He created you. Before you were born, He knew you. He knows what will happen every day for eternity. He is God. Nothing is better than Him. Even when we are sure that nothing could make us feel better than the way living in our sins does, He makes us feel better than ever.
Sure, you can forget all of this and leave it till tomorrow, but the reward in starting today is matchless. You are following the God who created every star in the sky and knows them by name. He knows your name. He knows the amount of hairs on your head. He knows what will happen tomorrow because He is the One who planned it all. He will give you peace and comfort in the trials. He will love you despite your past, present, and future sins.
I pray that, as hard as it is, you choose to follow God today.